1. Peanut butter. Actually any form of nut butter. Full of protein and healthy fats, the benefits of which multiply by 100 if you choose the ‘eating it from a spoon’ method. Also exponential benefits related to the size of tub purchased.

2. Raw cake mix. Or raw cookie dough. Raw egg is a fabulous source of protein so cake mix is perfect for a post-workout snack.

3. Wine. Duhhhh it’s grapes. Grapes are fruit. Wine = one of your five a day. Choose different colours to get the best nutritional benefit (but mixing red and white surprisingly doesn’t make rosé. You should have learnt that by now)

4. Gin and tonic. Quinine in the tonic repels mosquitoes. There are lots of mosquitos in the UK in March, therefore avoid getting nasty bites by drinking more gin. BOOM.

5. Champagne. See point 2. It’s grapes. With bubbles. And we all know air has no calories.

6. Cheese. As you are now in your 20s, bone quality is RAPIDLY decreasing, so make sure to incorporate extra calcium to avoid osteoporosis. A variety (i.e. a cheeseboard) is the best way to get all the essential nutrients (and this pairs nicely with the nutritional benefits obtained from multiple colours of wine)

7. Avocado. Whoever asks if you mind paying extra for guac is a FOOL. That’s what overdrafts and credit cards are for.

8. Brunch. Personal trainers are always advocating having multiple meals a day, so brunch is the perfect stop-gap between breakfast and lunch and it means you can eat burgers before midday. Without feeling guilty. Also the one time it is vaguely acceptable to be drunk by 2pm and asleep by 5.

9. Fruit-and-vegetable-based cakes. By nature, anything that has the word ‘carrot’, ‘courgette’ or ‘banana’ in the title has the sugar content neutralised by the clever usage of a fruit or vegetable. Meaning that banana bread is great for breakfast. Especially if it is Nutella swirled peanut butter chocolate chip (remember the benefits of peanut butter from earlier?)

10. Hummus. It’s a Waitrose essential (just like chocolate chip brioche, profiteroles and artichoke hearts) so it’s a life essential? Also chickpeas are full of protein and healthy fats (just like peanuts)

Is there anything I’ve missed? I mean the list could continue with the benefits of chocolate, non-raw cake mix (that would be a cake), cookies containing dried fruit, anything consumed after 2am…..